I Curse Too Fucking Much

Some people think I curse too fucking much. To those people, I say thank you for your unsolicited opinion. You are welcome. Researchers from the University of Cambridge, Maastricht University, Hong Kong University and Stanford found that those who swear more are more likely to be honest people. This same research revealed that if you are thinking about what you are going to say to people-please and filter, you are probably being less honest about your feelings. Whereas not giving a fuck and using profanity when appropriate is more honest because it is not passing through various gates seeking society’s approval.

When I was five, I remember being in the den playing with Legos when I overheard my mom and dad in the kitchen having a conversation. When my dad would say a word, I knew was bad, I would find a creative way to integrate it into my vernacular. For example, my dad used to work with this awful man, let us call him AM for awful man. He would yell at me when I was at the office with my dad and speak to me as if I were less than a piece of shit. So, one day, I walked into my dad’s office, I was six at the time, and said, “AM is an asshole.” My dad just looked at me and told me not to use that word again. I said, “Okay but I just want you to know AM is an asshole.” I was not quite sure what an asshole was, but I knew AM was definitely one.

While others spend time and energy abhorring curse words and giving them power they really do not have, I have always found them to be fun tools I can play with at convenient times to test my audience, create a desired emphatic effect, or let people know I am annoyed as hell and need to release some steam stat. Once those words fly out of my mouth, I watch the judgement ensue.

One would think I was a horrible person just because I like to curse and do not wait for the desired audience all of the time to do so. As I mentioned in, “I Am Golden”, I am defiant and I find joy in pushing society’s boundaries and seeing how far I can push them. I am not purposefully trying to offend anyone or get their panties in a bunch. I am simply communicating the way I like.

One of my really good girl friends and I often vent about how we will go on dates and the reaction we get when we curse. Yes, because apparently, I am subhuman and despite the fact that it is 2025, my desire to curse and drop a couple f bombs still makes me un lady like while it makes the man fucking cool. I think not. To me, their reaction is no different than the reaction of a potential new friend or acquaintance. If you do not like what comes out of my mouth, you do not need to listen. I am not going to change simply because you are offended. Maybe it is time you think about why my cursing offends you so much.

In the same study I mentioned initially, participants were asked why they swear. A majority of them said they often swore to be more honest about their feelings. Other studies have also suggested that it is intelligent people who swear more. That people who swear more have a larger vocabulary and swear because that is how they feel comfortable expressing themselves. So, who am I to tell someone not to be their authentic self?

During one of my swim training bouts, I had a training partner who loathed how much I swore. She even went as far as to tell me how her parents were offended. My response was apologetic, and I did question my behavior at the time. But now with more confidence and self-respect, I do not have an issue with how I choose to speak and when and where I use a curse word. Like everything else, my behavior that offends someone else says more about them than it does about me.

One of my favorite words to use to describe a horrible human being is the C word. My mom hates it. But when I stumble across a horrible woman who is hell bent on making me feel bad because I do not subscribe to her way of being and goes out of her way to treat me poorly, I cannot help but feel power when I utter those wonderful four letters. For me cursing is a form of catharsis. It is my way of interjecting some much needed comedic humor into my life. Life is heavy enough, me telling someone to go fuck themselves does not need to come with the large “Oh my goodness I cannot believe she said that” gasp.” It can be the throw away comment it was intended to be. A way for me to absolve myself of the yucky situation I have just exited from. It is deliberate, intentional and all about me, not anyone else. This is yet another case of it is me, not you.

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